Why Online Dating Is So Difficult

Online dating sucks. And the reason it sucks is because there is no accountability. People can say whatever they want. It doesn’t have to be true. It doesn’t have to be sincere. Anything goes. Technology allows us to do all kinds of crazy things that we would never do in the “real” world. I can post pictures of myself 10 years younger and 30 pounds lighter. Hell, I can say I’m 10 years younger than I am! If I’m married, no worries, I’ll just select “divorced” on my profile. It goes on and on. Zero accountability. I’ll meet someone on a dating site who will buy it. I can play it out as long as I want, or until they figure me out. And when they do, I’ll just get back online and find another.

No accountability allows for fakes. And fakes are a waste of time for the rest of us.

And fake doesn’t necessarily have to mean lying on your profile about age, physical attributes, or marriage status. The entire point of online dating is to actually meet someone face to face. The end goal of a dating site is to match people and create real life relationships, right? If you’re not prepared to take a risk, to be vulnerable, to be disappointed, and actually meet someone in person, you have ZERO business on an online dating site. You’re wasting other people’s time, because no matter how much they like you, or you like them, you’re not going to take the risk that is required. Again, no accountability. It doesn’t matter because; you’re getting what you want. Attention. A pen pal. A way to pass the time. Never mind that it’s a complete waste of the other person’s time.

There is no easy remedy to the problem of “fake” online daters. These businesses profit from every login so it’s not necessarily in their best interest to remove these users, and identifying them in the first place would take extra time and resources they probably don’t have or don’t want to expend. So for now, the people looking for a real dating experience and someone they can start a relationship with are stuck with searching for a needle in a haystack. And that simply takes a lot of time and effort. I guess it all comes down to how bad you want a relationship. It’s never been easy to find one, but I’m not sure online dating makes it any easier.